Newsweek Newsflash

Newsweek hits the stands this week with the news that Lifestyle can cause cancer.

If you can handle that news, prepare yourself for something even more dire--Life causes Death.

There. It's out of the bag. If you dare to live, you are certain to die. Unfortunately, if you are reading this it is already to late. You can't escape it. You are going to die. Isn't that terrible? What could be more horrible than to know for sure that you are going to die? If you didn't know that already, you are free to blame me. I am the messenger. I always blame the messenger because without him all would be bliss.

Interestingly, I seem to be an exception to the death syndrome. I have been around for a long time already and show no signs of departure. Apparently, I will live forever. Okay, I can live with that. Though I know it will be sad to see so many friends and loved ones come and go.